Finding God Amid The Parenting Diffidence

I have a confession to make….

I have fallen into the Parenting Diffidence. You know, that ugly phase where we, as parents, ask ourselves if we are doing it right, if we are too hard or too easy on our kids, if we are making a positive impact, teaching them the values we hold dear, or if we are even enough.  It’s not the first time I fell and it won’t be the last time either. It’s so, so easy to fall into this trap of self doubt and fear and sometimes it’s even harder to dig our way out but, dig we must!

This past week has been a struggle for me as I found myself wondering if I do enough for my family. I kept feeling like I had no part in contributing to my family, after all, I do not work or bring in any money but, I know how to spend it. I feel that, as a stay at home mom my house should be perfectly clean every night, clothes should be put away, dishes done and lunches ready but, that doesn’t always happen. In fact, there are usually still toys on the floor, clothes in the dryer and on the couch just waiting to be folded and put away, and dirty dishes in the sink. I feel like I should have perfect time management skills but, often wonder if I spent enough time playing, teaching and loving on my kids and making time for my dear husband. I wonder how I will be able to keep up when the kids are all doing extra curricular activities when I can’t keep up right now. I wonder how so many other parents seem to have it all figured out when I’m running around like puppy trying to catch it’s tail.

However, God always finds a way of telling me otherwise. Over the past few days there have been moments when I witnessed my kids do some amazing things or heard a stranger compliment on how well behaved my children are and it was in those moments that I knew I am doing something right. First, my children decided to write letters to family members and draw pictures to give as Christmas gifts on their own! I didn’t even care that they took a huge stack of printer paper and stationary without asking because, they were practicing the art of giving and doing it from the heart. Then, I was reminded of the movie Mom’s Night Out and the famous scene where the mother realizes that she is judging herself to harshly. Once again, there was a video posted on Facebook of a mom sharing a time in her life when she felt like a bad mom but her therapist gave her a different view point, one that showed her she was doing the best she could with what she had. And Finally, today I took my youngest two out to lunch and an elderly man told me that my kids were very well behaved and it was a blessing to hear!

Sure, I could have looked at each scenario and played it off as mishaps but, God communicates to us in the day to day happenings of our lives. Looking for those moments is the best way out! It’s assurance that you are enough, that God gave you your children because He trusts you with their souls, and that you are doing more good than harm.

You are enough! Stop comparing yourself to other parents or your children to other kids. Look for those precious moments when your children do and say the right things and never let go of those memories. Most importantly look to God for guidance, pray your heart out, and look and listen for the assurances that are always right there and see them for what they are, a message of love from God, The Father.

 

 

Remove Crayon From Laundered Clothes With Ease.

If you have kids you have probably experienced the nightmare of finding a melted crayon in they dryer and all over the clothes. It’s unavoidable it seems and oh, so infuriating! The first time this happened to me, the bright purple crayon was in the pant pocket of a pair of white T-Ball pants, which are already hard to clean! I immediately got on Google to find ways to get the crayon out and tried them all. They helped a little but there was still a huge purple stain.

When I made the Miracle Stain Remover I decided to try again. Wow, to my surprise, it worked! The stain is only visible if you look at it real close. Read Miracle Stain Remover to get the instructions for making you own.

Here is the picture of the stain.

Here is the picture of the stain.

Simply spray the Miracle Stain Remover over the crayon stain, rub it in well and wash as usual. Remove from dryer and be amazed!

Here is the after picture!

Here is the after picture!

Remove Laundered Crayon With Ease

Miracle Stain Remover

My oldest two kiddos have been playing T-Ball for the first time this year and it has been a blast! They have enjoyed playing in the sand, batting and running after the ball or running the bases just as much as my husband and I enjoyed watching the kids learn, make friends, run the wrong way, fight over the ball and much more. However, I have NOT enjoyed washing their T-Ball pants! It seems like no matter what I do, the stains will not go away!

I only use natural laundry detergent and it just wasn’t doing the job so I’ve spent all season trying different methods for getting the stains out of their T-Ball pants with little to no success. Fortunately, I found the perfect solution with only one week left to play and considering, we have not one but four games to play, this couldn’t have come at a better time!

This Miracle Stain Remover is all natural and contains only 3 ingredients, 4 including water! It takes less than two minutes to make, it’s cheap, and a little goes a long way! I was so surprised at how well it worked that, I actually wanted to remove more stains just to see the magic happen! Crazy huh! Who want’s to spend time removing stains from clothes? No one, but this made it fun! It could have been for the fact that I just mixed it together without doing a google or pinterest search first but who cares, it worked like magic!

To make the Miracle Stain Remover you will need;

  • Thieves Household Cleaner by Young Living: This is the most amazing household cleaner I have ever used! It contains ingredients from renewable plant and mineral sources, vegetable-based surfactants, and even more Thieves and lemon essential oils for extra cleaning power and it is highly concentrated so one bottle goes a vey long way.
  • Lemon Essential Oil
  • An All Natural Laundry Detergent: I use Trader Joes laundry detergent and love it but any all natural laundry detergent should work.
  • A Spray Bottle: I used a 28 oz. spray bottle for this. I recommend using a glass bottle as citrus oils can strip the plastic, however, I did not have one at the time so I just used plastic to mix it up. I will be using a glass container to keep it in when not in use.

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You will need to;

  1. Add two capfuls of Thieves Household Cleaner to the bottle.
  2. Add 20 – 25 drops of the Lemon Essential Oils.
  3. Add the laundry detergent until the bottle is half full.
  4. Use water to fill the remainder of the bottle.
  5. Mix well.

To use:

  1. Spray the Miracle Stain Remover over the stain.
  2. Rub it in using your finger tips or a gentle brush.
  3. Wash as usual.

Want proof it works? Just look at these before and after pictures!

Before: back of T-Ball Pants

Before: back of T-Ball Pants

Before: Front of T-Ball pants.

Before: Front of T-Ball pants.

After rubbing the Miracle Stain Remover in on the front of the T-Ball Pants

After rubbing the Miracle Stain Remover in on the front of the T-Ball Pants

After rubbing the Miracle Stain Remover in on the back of the T-Ball pants

After rubbing the Miracle Stain Remover in on the back of the T-Ball pants

After!

After!

stain remover

Supermom’s Persevere!

The first week has come and gone and surprisingly waking up early wasn’t that hard. Thursday was still hard but I had no choice but to wake up to take my mom to the doctor. Friday, was easy. I woke up energized and ready to start the day! I learned that I actually like having some quiet time in the morning. It made dealing with screaming and fighting children in the morning easier because lets face it, nobody likes to wake up to that! I also discovered that I had more energy throughout the whole day and it was kinda awesome! I guess to much sleep really is a bad thing.😦

Weekends have always been for family and always will and even though waking up early was nice, I loved sleeping in and waking up to the kiddos jumping in the bed on both Saturday and Sunday!

To say this journey to becoming a Supermom has been rough so far is an understatement but a Supermom knows how to overcome and does so by the Grace of God. So, I will push on and I will continue to make the transformation necessary to become my version of Supermom. I will live my life to the fullest and love on my husband and children daily and always tell them I love them.

My challenge for this week is to 1. Say I love you everyday and 2. to create a laundry schedule.

Why a laundry schedule? I am great at washing clothes but horrible at actually finding time, or making time to fold it and put it all away. So my plan is to continue to wash one load a day but instead of letting it pile up on my couch I will challenge myself to fold it all and put it all away on the same day! It can be done I know it can, it is after all a small challenge but, it’s one that will help me to organize my time later in the future, Time that I can use to be with my family and friends!

It’s A War Zone In My Head!

This morning I woke up like usual thinking, “I can’t wait to get back in bed and go back to sleep.” Then it hit me like a bomb, “but, I can’t because I told everyone I was going to make a change and I have to stick to it.” So spilling my guts worked but, at that moment part of me regretted it while the other part was happy it worked. I continued to fight with myself for the next 10 minutes! It was a war zone of thoughts, one negative thought followed by a positive thought. I think I even saw the little cartoon devil and angel on my shoulders!

Guess what? I did it! I listened to the little angel that was providing me with encouragement so I grabbed a cup of coffee and quickly checked emails and Facebook and then began praying! I offered God my day and asked for His strength to carry me and though God knows my thoughts I told Him why I want and need to make some changes in my life. I admitted that I am weak and in need of help but, what I got was so much more, hope. I knew in that moment God was telling me that I am moving in the right direction and that He will be my strength! It’s a good thing too because saying “No” to the negative thoughts and temptations this morning was really hard! My bed was calling my name, but I did it!

I read from a devotional this morning that our need for God is as constant as His outpouring of love for us and it couldn’t be more true. To continue to make changes I will need God’s help, without it, I may not be able to hear my guardian angel say “You’ve got this!” I also read a little of “Chosen and Cherished, Biblical Wisdom for Your Marriage. ” by Kimberly Hahn. I can’t tell you how many times I have tried to read this book and have yet to finish it. I have had it over 6 years!

I am a firm believer that a strong marriage is essential for our children to witness and since this journey is about becoming Supermom, I thought working on my marriage could only help! Her book is a study over Proverbs 31 which many have used as a guide to become a “good” wife among other things! The part I read today was asking “What does it mean to be good?” To which she referenced Proverbs 31:30 “a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”  Wow, this is what every Supermom wants, to feel appreciated for all that we do for our husband and children!

I am ready to become a Supermom! Whose with me?

Becoming Supermom!

Have you ever seen the new movie “Mom’s Night Out” with Patricia Heaton? If you haven’t check it out here http://www.momsnightoutmovie.com/.

The movie is all about a small group of moms that have decided to have a night out but along the way you learn about their struggles as a mom and watch what they planned to be a great night out falls apart. It’s hilarious! I loved it because, I was able to relate to each mom at some point or another and most often I related to the main character. Like her, I have always dreamed of being a stay at home wife and mother and thanks to my husband I am! My dream doesn’t stop there though, I don’t want to be just a wife and mom, I want to be Supermom! You know the kind that is the perfect wife and has everything together all the time! While I know that is unrealistic I also know I can do better. I can maintain a clean house. I can homeschool my kids. I can exercise and get healthy and I can play with my family! So why don’t I? I’m lazy and horrible at time management. I hate to admit it but, it’s true! I make excuses like “I don’t get enough sleep,” or “I don’t want to wake the kids up during nap time,” and “The kids wouldn’t let me get anything done,” and while they may be true, at the end of the day they are nothing more than excuses. Instead of checking out Facebook and working on my computer while the kids have breakfast and, since I’m being honest, way past breakfast time, I could do it while they are taking a nap, like they are right now! Instead of crawling back into bed after packing up my husbands lunch I could exercise, shower and make time to look decent, after all the kids are still sleeping then too.

So why am I spilling out my guts for everyone to read? For a few reasons, one being that now that everyone knows, I have to stick to it and I hope many of you will help me and another reason is that I can’t be the only mom who struggles with this. It is my hope to find accountability and to help others to grow with me by simply spilling my guts.

What is my plan and how am I going to become my own realistic version of Supermom? I am going to start small by making a few changes at a time for at least a week or until I feel confident that I can add more small changes into my routine. It will be a trial and error system until I find what is right for my family and for myself. My goal is to get healthy, and to find a routine that will allow me to have the proper time to exercise, clean, play, homeschool, and have family time.

My first change to implement is to wake up early instead of crawl back into bed until the kids wake up. I will start the day out like usual by packing my husbands lunch up and sending him off to work. Then I will use the next 2 hours to enjoy my cup of coffee, have breakfast, pray and or read my bible, exercise for at least 30 minutes and shower to appear decent for the arrival of my husband. (I think it’s about time he came home to find his wife in something other than my “stay at home mom” clothes!)

It may sound selfish to some of you that the first change is focusing on me but, it’s not. I can not expect to be the kind of Supermom I desire to be if I neglect myself and more importantly my relationship with God. I will absolutely fall short if I do not ask God for the strength to continue and listen to Him as he works to mold me into the Supermom and wife He created me to be and that I want so badly to be.

This is perhaps the hardest change to implement because I love, I mean I really, really love sleeping in and I have never been consistent at working out, so please pray for me and encourage me as I embark upon this journey of becoming Supermom.

Gone but Never Forgotten: Finding Beauty in Tragedy

March 12, 2004 started off like any normal Friday during spring break but, it certainly didn’t end that way! It was a day that claimed many names; They day McKinney lost it’s innocence, The Truett Street Murders and The Quadruple Murders, a day that made national news.

I still remember hearing about it for the first time like it was yesterday. Saturday morning March 13, 2004, My mother burst into my room waking me up very early, yelling there has been a murder. Nothing can wake up a teenager like the word murder, I sat up and asked her to repeat herself hoping I had heard wrong. She proceeded to tell me there had been a murder and than Matthew Self, Mark and Rosa Barbosa and Austin York had been shot execution style late the night before. My heart froze but my body went into hyper mode. I had to hear it for myself, so I jumped out of bed and ran to the nearest TV. Sure enough it was true, I wasn’t dreaming and I didn’t hear things incorrectly. Matthew, Austin, Mark and Rosa had been shot and the only survivor at that moment was Matthew. I just broke down, I could not hold in the tears and I prayed as I sat there glued to the TV. I prayed hoping for a miracle, “Please God, let Matt survive this.” It didn’t take long until the news reported that Matt didn’t make it. I was crushed. I grew up with Matt and have known him since kindergarten so I just couldn’t wrap my mind around why someone would take his life so cruelly.

Returning to School that Monday was also a day I will never forget. The hallways that were normally filled with laughter and friends talking were now filled with the emptiness and loss of Matt and Austin. There were friends, teachers, counselors, and youth ministers all crying and comforting each other, there was hardly a dry eye to be found.

In the midst of all of this tragedy and suffering was beauty. Love was all around, there was no racism, no hurtful words being said, no difference in cliques and social groups. Friends and families were saying I love you more, the whole town became a community of people that showed support for each other. It was beautiful! It was beautiful to see people setting aside their differences for the purpose of helping each other cope with this tragedy. It was beautiful to see an outpouring of people giving their time, money, and prayers to help the families cope. It was beautiful to see that people were and are capable of loving and showing compassion for each other, even those who are different.

While our hearts were hurting, many of us learned an important lesson that day. We learned that life doesn’t last forever and tomorrow isn’t promised, even to the youngest of us. We learned that we should take every opportunity to tell those we love how we feel before it’s to late.

We continue to remember Matt, Austin, Mark and Rosa today and we honor their memory by keeping those lessons close to our hearts and by sharing our memories of them.

I will never forget cheering for Matt and Austin as they played football or always searching for Matt after the game while the football team gathered around as we played the school song. I will never forget swinging on the swings with Matt in elementary school or him assuring me that the weather wont get as bad as rumored. I won’t forget the way he made me feel when he took a second to say hi to me while we were with our different cliques. Matt was a great person and so was, Austin, Mark and Rosa. Pray today for their families and show them the same love they felt 10 years ago.

Gone but Never Forgotten! #34 #38Matt Austin Mark Rosa